THE i-THOUGHT


A Conversation With Samana

Mind is the false refuge. Mind is a ghost, as is the one who follows and identifies with mind. The ghost appears stable, located, substantial, by means of the body identity. However, this form, this congregation of elements, is but an appearance, phenomenal, and can not substantiate the ghost. This desire to substantiate creates a great tension, and this desire can never be satisfied. The body- form is a symphony, but not limited as imagined by the notions of the limits of an isolated and separate shape, size, proportion or location. This elemental body is seamlessly one with, and as, all elements, the elemental play. So where does this i reside but in mind? And where does this mind reside but as thought? And where does this thought reside, and from where does it arise?

Notice all thoughts have always been followed, and that this following of thought is the story, not the content. If thought is followed, one is not the thought. So be still. Simply be still. What does this mean to be still? This is to be stillness itSelf. Full stop. Recognize ‘you’ are prior to thought, as That which all thoughts arise. And so, notice from where do thoughts arise. There is but Awareness of thought. This you you think you are is a thought, and the habit, the conditioning, has been this outward arc of identification. The world appears by means of this external glance, and the object self is determined, and substantiated by means of the reflection of other. This is the nature of hypnosis. If you are the witness to thought, you can not be thought. As thoughts are the objects of Awareness you believe you are the separate subject. The i thought is an object of Awareness.

When the i thought is caught, the mind drops and dissolves into the heart, the i thought returns to Source, and the knot of identification is cut. This is the inward arc. This is what unfolded here. The i thought returned to the heart from which it arose. The i thought is consumed by and as the Flame of Silence. As such, this heart has no location, is not 'your' heart, not ‘my’ heart, and is in fact boundless. This heart is impersonal, this is Heart, this is Self. The inward and the outward arc collapse, and with it the i thought. This is Grace. One could label this surrender, but there is no doer, this is choiceless. There is no longer a somewhere, there is but 'everywhere'. As absence is Presence. The Flame of Silence is That, which consumes all that is not real, and this Flame of Silence is the Pure Subject, formless, Love without conditions, and you are That.

When the habit of distraction is relaxed, one can simply simmer. Remain in and as the fire, the Flame of Silence. When one is no longer determined by sensation, or that which arises, one is That which is prior, as That which remains. All of what has driven and compelled the outward arc simply dissolves, as flowing Grace, unencumbered by the habit of clinging as a means of identification. It was never the material, it was always the reactivity. This must be accepted, that one may be still. As the habit of the outward seeking and determining arc is relaxed, what remains is That which is changeless.

As the i thought is consumed, the great transparency, the great openness is ever present, and if the i thought appears, it is simply this, an appearance, which does not, and can no longer determine location, as location is story dependant. It is that which comes and goes, but the Seeing, the Knowing, is That which does not come and go. What is, has always been, prior to this arisng, as that which IS has never changed, is changeless. and one is That.

The Divine madness will certainly arise. The Divine madness arises as the spontaneous inquiry, the question, 'what happened to i'? And this is natural, this is the apparent birthright as this arising, as this question, this inquiry, is your true Guru, as That which will be and is the unfolding. There is no catching understanding, there is no figuring out, as this is suffering, and is the means of avoidance, of resistance, to That which simply is. You see, the true madness is the complex of beliefs which establishes an imaginary center which the i thought not only believes it occupies, but defines. The i thought is nowhere to be found.

The sense of no doer may still maintain a subtle sense of separateness until the unfolding is such that the notion of other not only includes self, but is self. This is the apparent final gap. Unicity is such that the personal notion of God disappears, and with it the personal. This is Bhakti and Jnana as One. All scriptures point to this, as 'My Father and i are One'. While the mystic is believed to be about other, in truth this is about the great collapse. This is the pathless path of no-self. This can be called the great unfolding, but there is no-one to unfold, this can be called the return to the natural state, but return from where, to where, who returns? There is but the natural state, and this is the stateless-state. This may not arise, and may take lifetimes, as it certainly already has. But for one who is 'ripe', for one who has had a taste, this is the way, the Bird Path, the pathless-path, which is the inquiry of direct means. For some, inquiry may merely be a stirring of the vessel. And even so, is good medicine, or as it may be called, ‘made-i-seen. Om Shanti. All Love.