Satsang Inquiry

Inquiry - "I feel I need more capacity"

Reply - "Regarding the notion of capacity, as a relative point of view, capacity may be a useful word or concept, however recently at Satsang, capacity was spoken to as 'there is only capacity'. By means of intention, the term, label, and notion of capacity, has by its nature the potential to validate the limited self, maintain identification, and suggest to the limited and seeking self, that capacity must be gained, attained, built, or sought, once again establishing the notion of future, somewhere, other, determined by the past, and the belief or sense of lack. If capacity is needed or required, 'something' must not be enough, 'I must not be worthy', 'I must not be ready'. Ready for what? Who is this I? Who is this doer of capacity? Capacity itself is made other. The self now appears divided. The interpretation of capacity is the imagined measure which determines the presence of what one seeks, which is already what one IS. Consider seeking this I, not capacity.

Capacity can only speak to now, and now is what is. What is the apparent point of reference of capacity? The I that desires capacity is itself a limited point of view. From this limited, and materialist point of view of self or contraction, the desire for capacity is the invitation to surrender the one who desires, and as such, the desire. Surrender the I that says 'I feel I need'. It is the I that desires. This I is superimposed. How does one merge with that which is desired? When this I itself is surrendered, one is That which one desired capacity 'for', as the apparent longing as distance, the imagined gap, dissolves. This is the apparent movement from 'for', to 'as', to IS. Desire, longing, is separation by means of the notion of other.

The notion of capacity is bound to the object body. If this is determined by the body, capacity is itself in constant flux, and as such, can not be measured. If this is determined by Awareness, Consciousness, this is immeasurable, as the question itself arises of this. Is the vessel holding its capacity of space? The vessel does not possess space. The vessel and the space are one. Is the capacity for Awareness? Can there be capacity for emptiness? For Self? One is Awareness. One is Self. Consider, there is only capacity. The word itself conveys and imparts, spacious, open, freedom. One is already and always That. 

 Satsang Notes