So, to just speak briefly about something that comes up in this sharing because there has been this apparent gap, of course there is no gap.
The assumption of this medium only confirms at best what is already the case and so one would then otherwise be required to inquire as to what was the beginning of this meeting as this sharing and how did one appear and what were the so-called circumstances of being present to which then this appears to be stationary and familiar and serves as a foundational understanding for all the other than apparent comings and goings in relation to time and space, an on and off principle or a sequence principle or a location principle.
These are all layers and layers and layers of superimposition that as each successive layer that one appears to be gaining or gathering understanding. It's a layering process with mind veiling what is already directly established and what is already directly established is then simply that which is already known.
So the tendency to be looking for more or looking for something else is very deeply habituated. It is identified as 'my mind' and accepted as a functionality, a seeming process of the movement from what may be called from this play, the inner to the outer, and this play is always reinventing it beliefs and re-establishing itself and clarifying and defining by means of an assumption of center.
There is often this what may be called phase of engagement of looking at different teachers and teachings and activity engaged with activity because activity itself loves activity and substantiates itself repeatedly in this way.
What is actually present in this is still out of view in how it appears to be, so determined in its looking for something and claiming victory and new understandings and possibly states that come and go and then the need to reclaim and refine these states.
This sharing, as that which appears as this sharing, speaks to and speaks As what is not coming and going.
There is no pull for these states and experiences, the question then falls onto the experiencer.
So this outward looking, by the time it is recognized and self-recognized as a kind of chronic condition, it appears to be emphasizing and re-emphasizing and building that which all the teachings then say one must be rid of.
So the fact is that it is this self-position that is suddenly desperately at times seeking to come to terms with a momentum that it has no control over, that it's not in charge of, that it has no choice with and yet it's so profoundly compelled to equalize and profit and to become something from what is being pulled. That if something is stripping off, falling away, there is a pull to promptly re-establish itself in a new improved version and it does so in an overlapping fashion because there cannot be any gap in it because the gap would be an invitation for emptiness, it would be an invitation for fear for that which is constantly seeking to substantiate itself and though the invitation is always present and this longing is what can be called universal by nature.
It is in fact rare that one simply says yes and even prior to the saying yes that there is a Silent Yes where the entire beingness is permeated.
It is as if one were to view time, the construct of time which is linear, as a very long straight and narrow hallway that has hundreds if not thousands of doors in it and there is no visible beginning and end of it, and let us just say for story's sake, that each one of these doors represents another lifetime.
It is the nature of this Silent Yes that all the doors are open not one at a time but simultaneously. This is the column of breath of which beingness takes a stand As Truth.
So, the vigilance isn't on the content and the attention isn't on the material and renunciation isn't of objects. It is this willingness of this renunciation of the i which is in fact this renunciation of no or disagreement and this that appears as vigilance or even what may be called the discipline which denotes disciple is the abiding As Yes.
The illusion of control is a challenging threshold for the ego.
The whole dynamic of this chronic phase of teachers and teachings and activity and reactivity is itself impersonal and it appears in this spiritual exploration of spiritual materialism that it is and remains and reinforces something very personal. In fact, it shadows what's called self-help.
This sharing has nothing in common with either end of that apparent dilemma. From a personal point of view this sharing, as the Nature of this sharing, is wholly unsatisfying for Samana has nothing to give you.
In fact, what's invited is that you approach this sharing Empty, not as some-body but as no-body.